Lance Armstrong Gunderson, Con Man

The con-artist recently known as Lance Armstrong, originally known as Lance Edward Gunderson, has played nolo contendre and placed himself among the ranks of such other ethical stalwarts as Spiro Agnew.

In general, cheating for profit and benefits is fraud, fraud is a crime, and perpetrators of crime are prosecuted. That's a pretty standard approach in the civilized world; the fact that it is not always followed does not make it less valid.

This particular scammer enlarged his game beyond the initial hustle. He levelled-up to build a heroic narrative out of his cancer recovery and made himself into a cause and a hero for everybody that has had somebody fighting cancer (which is a universal condition).

In making himself the person who takes a stand against cancer (a fairly safe proposition), he has played on the emotions of millions to establish his brand and his sinecure.

He joins the likes of Haile Selassie, Joseph Smith, L. Ron Hubbard and Pat Robertson in the pantheon of hucksters who have built narratives, organizations, and economies that outlive their originator's utility in spite of a fraudulent foundation.

These are the successful metaphysical Ponzi schemes, the cults that become Too Big To Fail, the once-marginal beliefs that move into the mainstream and demand to be treated with the same respect as all other belief systems. Whereas economic Ponzi schemes can be found out through accounting, there's no challenging a metaphysical Ponzi scheme because it's in the realm of belief, and we have freedom of belief.

When it works, it's the con man's climbing the Mount Everest of Moral Equivalence, it's L. Ron Hubbard saying, treat my believers just like the Jews, Christians, and Muslims, because - hey, who's to say? After the denouement, the True Believers will aver, Sure he's done wrong, but he's done a lot of good. Google Jimmy Swaggart.

The puzzle is, how do we engage otherwise good, intelligent, honorable people who subscribe to these narratives? Do we marginalize them as marks and suckers? Do we treat them as misguided but well-intentioned? Do we respect their beliefs, hold our noses and disregard what we know of their weltanschauung?

It's pretty easy to not care about Tom Cruise's religion. It's understandable to consider the belief structure of a person wearing magic underwear who also wants to be in charge of nuclear weapons. It offends me to see a con-man hustling yellow rubber bands, hawking membership-identity-affinity paraphernalia, and playing on the emotions of cancer patients and their families.



To me, that's the true fraud of Lance Gunderson, and I believe he is yet to be held accountable for it. We note for the record that LiveStrong doesn't contribute any money at all for cancer research. None.

Pittsburgh's GNC Gets a Whiff of Weakness from LiveStrong and Lance Armstrong

Any resemblance to Jerry Lewis back in the day is in your head, even if they're both big in France.

There's an old story about a Middle Eastern family, and I've been unable to establish its provenance. It goes like this:

The patriarch of a small family was becoming old and frail. His children were worried about him, so they started preparing a special chicken for him to eat. They fed the chicken grain and corn and helped it become fat, so that their father might eat the chicken and the chicken soup and regain his strength.

The local ruffians saw the family's efforts. When the chicken was at its plumpest, just before it was to be butchered, the scoundrels stole the chicken and ate it themselves.

The patriarch's children were angry, and the sons wanted to confront the blackguards and demand payment. But the weak old man said No, just leave it alone, it'll be OK.

The oldest son wouldn't listen, and he confronted the man he knew was the thief. The thief and his cohort beat the son and left him in a heap on the family's doorstep.

The situation persisted for two days, and the ruffians took to taunting and jeering at the family members when they walked on the streets.

On the third day, the gang seized the daughter and raped her.

The old man said, leave them alone, nothing good will come of this. His two sons wouldn't listen and sought revenge. Emboldened by their progressive successes, the gang set upon the two sons and killed them.

One lesson is: competitors and predators can discern weakness and will exploit the perception to their advantage.

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Opportunistic engagement of perceived weakness is a universal activity. Recently President Obama committed the United States to war against Libya's Khaddafi / Gaddafi. As the days pass all the people who advocated for intervention are now backpedaling from it, as yet another group of theoretical idealists learns what my friend Bob once explained: no plan survives contact with the enemy.

The street smells weakness; although the effort relies on American men and machines, Obama can't support another war and so Obama is using NATO as a beard, and the Administration claims that we are supporting a French/British/Italian effort. Gaddafi knows that American resolve weakens as time passes, and so Gaddafi has been emboldened to proclaim his likely victory, and Gaddafi boasts that he will be in power longer than Obama will. Also perceiving weakness, Louis Farrakhan has declared that the President is a "murderer". It's the same story; people sense weakness in competitors and use it to their advantage.

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But Libya is not the point of this post. Rather, as July draws near, all events must be considered in terms of the Tour de France and Lance Armstrong. Lance's hold over the American side of the business and the spectacle of the Tour has increased with his retirement.

Although he is no longer riding, Lance is still making money and he has much to lose. He is a part-owner of the team riding for RadioShack. His foundation takes in millions annually and provides a powerful position. LiveStrong-Lance's penetration of the American aspirational-health-cancer-athletic market is astounding (and who isn't in that population); there's a reason that even Nike kisses up to them. To a competitor, the value of the Livestrong brand is significant and ripe for redistribution.



Are there indications that predators sense weakness or distraction in LIVEstrong-Armstrong? Consider, if you would, these recent advertisements by Pittsburgh-based GNC.



Forget Novitsky. When marketing types think you are weak and easy pickings for a knock-off campaign that leverages your market penetration for their own benefit, you're really in trouble. GNC is eating Lance Armstrong's chicken.